A few years ago I was coaching the Kitsilano senior boy’s basketball B team. It was there that I was introduced to Trevor Mills. Kitsilano long time head coach Randy Coutts introduced us and thought that Trevor would be a good addition to the coaching staff. The team had some great success in our first year at the helm. After two seasons I left the program to pursue my career, but I maintained contact with Trevor. I always knew his older brother Spencer struggled with mental health issues, but I was in complete shock when I heard a couple of years back that Spencer had taken his own life. Knowing Trevor as well as I did, and knowing his love for hip-hop music, it came as no surprise to hear that he had channeled the emotion of losing his brother into his music. Trevor took something so painful and used it in a positive way. He wrote “Evidence of a Struggle” a 7-track EP that takes the listener through the stages of grief one goes through when experiencing the loss of a loved one. The EP is powerful, emotional and educational.
I caught up with Trevor to talk about how basketball and hip-hop have helped him overcome the loss of losing a loved one.
This is the evidence of how to overcome a struggle.
VB: Basketball has always been a big part of your family’s life. Describe how its been such a big influence in your life.
TM: Basketball has always been a passionate interest of mine and my brother’s since we were kids. My father was executive director for Sport BC and got us the lucky position of carrying the national flags for Canada and Yugoslavia when they met in an exhibition game at the Agrodome. My brother went in the wrong direction and Vlade Divac had to straighten him out. So going back to a young age, basketball was always a passion but I really didn’t take to playing the game until after High School. I was more focused on football and wrestling. I got involved in different men’s leagues and once I got into teaching at Kitsilano as a high school teacher, Randy Coutts introduced us and we took on the Senior Boy’s B team, which was a great experience to learn the game from a coaching perspective. From there, after the unfortunate passing of (Kits) assistant coach Dave Treloar from the Senior A team, Randy Coutts asked me to come in as an assistant coach. So that introduced me to a bunch of different experiences. Going to Gonzaga for team camps, meeting (Gonzaga Head Coach) Mark Few, learning from some of the greats. Also got to see the world. We took the team to New York, China, Hawaii twice. Seeing the game in different cultures. Seeing what the game does for different kids and adults as well. From there I was able to meet up with Casey Archibald, Cassidy Kannemeyer and coached the U16 BC provincial team. That was a great experience. I pulled back a bit after working on my Masters Degree and working on music. I’m still at Kitsilano, which (basketball) is a huge part of the its culture.
VB: You mentioned your dad. He’s still involved in basketball heavily, right?
TM: Yeah, he’s the general manager at the Richmond Oval and over the past few years he’s continued his position as chair of basketball Canada. One thing I admire the most is he’s 64-years old and is still playing basketball. He’s been playing basketball since he was 8-years old. I don’t think he’s missed a season. He’s still playing the game which is really cool.
VB: Let’s switch gears now and talk about music. How did you become a rapper?
TM: My dad actually gave me my first tape. It was the Fat Boys “Crushin’” back in 1987. As soon as I heard that I started nodding my head. I was obsessed with the lyrics, started writing them down and that’s when I went to Emily Carr elementary school and I met Dave Nelson (aka Emotionz). He was really into the music as well. He had a whole collection of hip-hop tapes that he had got from his uncle, so he was sharing that with me. We wrote our first raps together in grade two, which was really cool. That was my first introduction to hip-hop. In grade ten I met up with June 10, who’s another Vancouver emcee. He mentored me a little more. That’s sort of how it all came.
VB: You’ve had some hard times as of late, namely with your brother passing. How do you find the strength to put the emotion of losing your brother the way you did into music?
TM: The hip-hop that I’ve listened to over the years has been typically artists who’re vulnerable, who’re personable. Rappers like The Grouch, Pharoahe Monch coming out with the PTSD album, talking about suicide and mental illness. So many artists that when I see them get vulnerable, using hip-hop as a genre to do that, I’m really impressed with that and that’s inspired me, and that gave me the strength to share my story. Because it should hurt a bit. Creating art in my opinion should take a bit out of you. You should be questioning yourself and examining yourself. There were many times doing this project that I doubted myself, I thought “I shouldn’t be doing this. This is too much.” But that’s where the real music comes from and that’s when people reached out to me and said “I’m so glad you’re doing this”. My father committed suicide or my mother or my brother did, and I really feel that. Dead Prez was another big inspiration with their album “Can’t Sell Dope Forever” where they teamed up with Outlawz, and Stickman was talking about his experience with his brother and their addiction and it got very personal, and I thought “if they’re doing that in their communities, I can do that in Vancouver.” They call Vancouver “The Vanity” and I think its because we hold these masks up, these shields, and I thought, especially with Vancouver hip-hop, that this is going to be the realest album that comes out here. There is a lot of great people making music in this city, but there is still a façade where a lot of are trying to imitate what’s going on in America. This is Northwest hip-hop and this is personable and vulnerable as it can be.
VB: The fact that you’re a high school teacher and a rapper, that must make for a unique dynamic with your students. How have your students responded to your music?
TM: I got the most supportive student body in the world. One of the things that I should mention is, I started a hip-hop club at Kitsilano three years ago. That’s been very successful. We’ve had some very talented kids come out of the woodwork. On the EP “Evidence of a Struggle” track number five “More than a Moment” features Thoughtwatch which is two Kitsilano students Max Maier and Simon New, who produced and rapped on the track, as well Emma Jones and Eva Stulberg who’re both students, they’re featured on the album too. The feedback from the students has been so great. We rented out the Rio Theatre in East Vancouver for the release party and we sold out. We had five of my students perform. Actually, I think there was eight students that came. We (also) had parents from the school, staff from the school, we had support from the administration. It is scary to be a teacher and talk about such a sensitive subject from a personal experience, but I come from the school of thought where you need to teach from who you are. Former NBA head coach Phil Jackson used to say he coached from who he was and bring whatever feeling he had into his practice. So if he was angry going into his practice, he would bring that anger in. He wouldn’t work against it. So that’s a page out of his book that I use.
VB: With all of the tragic experiences that you went through with your brother passing the way he did, when you coach young basketball players who’re maybe having some tough times in their lives, do you try to get them to channel their experiences with basketball, just like you did through your music?
TM: Definitely. Each person comes with their own skillset, their own areas of improvement and their own areas of strength. What I try to do as an educator and as a coach is use a strength based approach. If you have a player who can’t dribble than you’re not going to put him at point guard. You find a spot that works. Maybe they’re really good under the hoop, so you put them on the low block and work on just a couple of moves with (some) finesse and try to chip away and get them there. I find coming from a place of encouragement and constructive feedback is so important with (young) athletes and with students. I see students that are struggling and players that are struggling, I find that it comes from self esteem and (they) really need to work on that, because that’s really what gets kids into drugs, gangs, violence. It comes from a sense of self worth, so what I hope to do with my music, with my coaching and with my teaching practice is instill confidence in young people, where they find a place where they feel welcomed.
VB: You gone through a lot lately. Do you use coaching basketball, teaching and music as a way to escape, yet give back at the same time?
TM: That is something that I caught myself in. The summer that my brother passed, I over programmed myself. I’d over schedule and I think that staying busy was a way of neglecting what was really going on in my life. At the time of my brothers passing I was doing my masters at Simon Fraser University, coaching the senior team at Kitsilano, teaching full time and I had started working with the provincial team as well, so I had four huge things going on and when my brother passed, everything just dissipated. It was sort of like a shock wave and I just dropped everything. I had to step away from my coaching. I had to step away from my masters. I had to step away from teaching. I took a leave for half a year. I really didn’t go into a gym. I went to spectate, and that was nice to not be on the bench. I really had to look at who I was. I was burned out. I took the time to really feel what was going on, with the grief and where I’d been for the past five years with my brother struggling with mental illness. That’s when I wrote “Evidence of a Struggle”. It was just sort of a step-by-step of the stages of grief.
VB: You’ve raised quite a lot of awareness and money for mental illness through your Kick Starter project. Explain what that’s all about.
TM: We started it this time last year and we were successful with it. The idea behind that was along with Bodhi Jones, who I need to shout out, he was a huge part of the fund raising. He was in the peak performance project at the time. When my brother Spencer passed we got into fund raising together, throwing these gigs around Vancouver. Really the people to thank are the people that donated. They were so generous. We raised funds for the Joseph & Rosalie Segal Family Centre at Vancouver General Hospital, which is a cutting edge mental health facility. That was our platform and I wanted to release this album but we didn’t have the money to do that. What we did was a Kick Starter program, where I did the spoken word that was featured on CTV during Bell “Let’s Talk” month. That was a 60-day campaign. We raised 11 thousand dollars to release the album. Proceeds from this album will go to generate more funds and awareness for mental health.
VB: Are you back coaching the senior boy’s B team again at Kitsilano?
TM: We actually couldn’t do the B team this year due to the renovations at the school. We lost the small gym, so I’m doing rugby this year and working a bit with the bigs on the senior boy’s A team. (I’m) not too heavily involved right now with the team. But whatever (Randy) Coutts needs, he can come to me for a practice and things like that. More of peripheral support this year, but (I’ll) be back into it next year.
VB: Who’re some of the kids to watch at Kitsilano this year?
TM: Luka Lizdek is a grade 11 guard who’s just a pit bull. He gets steals, he makes shots. He can make threes, he can slash, he’s a great player. He’s the one to watch.
VB: So you’ll be back coaching the senior boy’s B team next year, any plans to get back into coaching at the provincial level?
TM: Definitely the B team again. I really enjoy that. It’s more of our grade 11 team because as you know the (basketball) culture is extensive at Kits. We have so many kids that want to play (basketball) and there’s only so many spots available for two grades. That’s why I really enjoy the B team, getting kids that really want to play the game and develop that talent.
VB: What’s next for you musically. How do you follow up an album that had so much emotion?
TM: We have four more music videos to finish before I’m done with this campaign. I released the album but I didn’t want to do the promotional side until I had the music videos. I my opinion nowadays your really, not as good as your videos, but it’s a video culture now with You Tube and Vimeo and I really thought it was important to me to do the songs justice by adding the visuals to them. I have a lot of friends who’re just so talented behind the camera in terms of writing treatments for videos, so that’s where it’s at right now. Just released the “Hood Boys “video, we’re doing one for “More Than a Moment” right now. We already did the video for “Gutter”, it’s just getting edited right now. There’s some good momentum to the campaign, so 2016 is going to be about promoting it and performing it. I’m still writing songs on the side, but in terms of what’s next (musically), I’m not sure yet.
VB: Where can people find your music?
TM: Evidence of a Struggle.ca is where you can listen to the tracks, order merchandise. We’re putting up baseball shirts, t-shirts and some other swag up there. So go check it out and listen to the tracks.
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